Civility in a Troubled World

 

Part I: Civility in a Troubled World (3-Minute read)

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How to find civility in a troubled world. Recently, my friend ‘Gloria’ had a most unfortunate encounter with some close family members over politics. After briefly expressing her biblical views on a current events to some family members that she dearly loves, the room became filled with anger, political accusations, yelling, and name calling. Like a powder-keg, this seemingly innocent conversation blew up into full-blown chaos. A Bible-believing Christian, she felt intimidated and at a loss for words. This experience was especially challenging for her, as these were people she loves dearly and sees often. Once things calmed down again, Gloria wondered, what did I say wrong? How could I have handled things differently? Could there have been a different, more civil outcome?

Perhaps you have, at some time, unwittingly stepped into such a figurative hornet’s nest yourself, and felt totally unprepared for what transpired. But remember this: God’s ways are not the ways of this world, and we are called to be bold and lovingly bring light to this tormented world as we strive to lead souls to Jesus.

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first.”

John 15:18

Civility, according to Merriam-Webster, is defined as “civilized conduct; especially courtesy and politeness.” By this definition, I think it is safe to say that today, civility and respect are waning in the world in which live. Civility is central to living a good Christian life, however, it seems to be on the decline. Though as Christian believers, we may very well be out of synch with our culture, and even with those we love, we still must try our best to maintain civility and share our faith, by first praying and asking for God’s unfailing help.

If we follow the old adage, “Don’t talk politics or religion,” which is clearly the safest way to go, how can we possibly share perspectives, learn, grow, and lead souls to Christ??? At times it seems this lack of civility has caused us to no longer be able to share the Love of Christ, or to disagree, causing us to avoid meaningful discussions and confrontations about challenging topics, particularly the pressing, high impact current events of the day? Perhaps, but it need not be this way if we are well-prepared beforehand. For scripture tells us in Ephesians 6:10-18:

^” Be strong in the Lord through his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. ¹⁴ Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, ¹⁵ and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ¹⁶ In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. ¹⁷ Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

Ephesians 6:10-17

 

Pray Unceasingly for Civility in a Troubled World

We are called to pray unceasingly and get into Scripture, both for ourselves and especially for our enemies. By so doing, the Holy Spirit will pave the way and be our guide, as we gently share His Word, and a biblical worldview. To do so, we must first pray for discernment, strength, and courage to share our witness in word & deed, and ‘put on the armor of God.’ This is the best preparation of all for having Jesus fight your battles with you and for you as you look for civillty in a troubled world. This scripture continues on:

“And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. 

Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.”

Ephesians 6:18-20   /  NIV

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© Copyright Adele M. Gill

 

PART II: 7 Practical Ways to Find Civility in a Troubled World

Adele M. Gill

 “Do to others as you would have them do to you.”

Luke 6:31

At the very core of civility is respect. That is, respect for God, one another—and ourselves. In Part I of this series, we learned what to do both before, and during, our being verbally assaulted unmercifully for sharing our Christian biblical world view. Scripture tells us that we as Christians are called to be loving peacemakers—to love one another—even and especially those who are our adversaries or enemies. That includes when even when those closest to us are bent on engaging in senseless, bitter arguments, as they attempt to derail us from our deeply held longtime faith beliefs that we hold dear.

Jumping in, getting angry, and hostile is not the answer. But we must be prepared for discord. It is divisive and pulls families and friends apart—sometimes leaving them estranged. Perhaps even pushing us to become enemies with those we once loved. For Christians, this behavior is considered a non-option as scripture tells us:

“Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.  If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them.”

Luke 6:27-29

 

Here are a few things to remember when hostile encounters arise:

• Try to give others a pass, and don’t take their hostility to heart. It’s on them, not you.

 

• Scripture tells us to turn the other cheek.

 

• Remember that God doesn’t expect you to be a doormat or a kick-me. It’s ok to ease out or step back from angry altercations, if need be.

 

• No one says you have to go into the lion’s den. It’s best to  staying true to God and ourselves. The gospel and the Christian life are all about Love. Let prayer and scripture be your guides.

 

• Choose your battles widely. It’s ok at times to pray for people, rather than engaging with them in arguments.

 

• You don’t have to convince anyone of what is right and true. That is God’s job! You are simply a seed planter.
• Don’t expect to change other people’s minds during these encounters.  I have made great headway planting seeds, turning the other cheek, then stepping back from the conversation. We don’t need to be heard, acknowledged, or please others—only by God himself. We don’t need others to express agreement with our beliefs. We just need to love them by sharing truth, and keep moving on one step, one day at a time.

 

^“Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”

Phil 2:14-15

Surely at times we need a ‘social reset’ so calmer heads prevail, rather than anyone trying to force their beliefs on others in an attempt at consensus and changing hearts and minds.. No one should be abruptly silenced by the intimidation and aggressive behavior of others, unable to practice the First Amendment– freedom of speech and religion–No one! But it does happen at times and we need to be prepared.

At times it is important to express your beliefs, but sad to say, you may want to choose carefully who you share them with, as there may be serious repercussions and discord ahead. It is always hurtful when people, especially those we are closest to us, mock and minimize the truths we embrace as Christians. When they become argumentative and cannot accept us and the Christina values and ethics we hold dear in our hearts and minds. The truths we live by may very well be unpopular, causing us to be ostracized and scoffed at. But perhaps this scripture may shed some light on how we may respond when we search for civility in a troubled world.

Perhaps it’s time to consider a new way to deal with the discord and mayhem that can come from the arguments of others. Oftentimes, the other person is argumentative because they are angry about something else that may be going on in their life. So how can we handle such adversity as we witness and share the gospel of peace? Scripture says:

^“ If the home is deserving, let your peace rest on it; if it is not, let your peace return to you. ¹⁴ If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet. ¹⁵ Truly I tell you, it will be more bearable for Sodom and Gomorrah on the day of judgement than for that town.”

Matthew 10:13-15

© Copyright   |   Adele M. Gill

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